The experience of ‘getting over someone’.

Love is the most amazing and heartbreaking thing ever. Heartbreaks are the worst and once you truly experience it, you don’t even want to wish it on your worst enemy. So many people go throughs heartbreaks and sometimes it seems impossible to get over. Everyone has their own little way of dealing with sadness but if you seriously don’t know what to do, here’s my little experience.
I had my first boyfriend 3 years ago. He was the boy I wanted to date since the first day I spoke to him. I didn’t think it would ever happen until one day it did, we got together and life was just like those romantic movies. But slowly as time passed, things started to turn evil and it made me sad because I could see I was losing someone important to me. As presumed he broke up with me, I was truly broken. I became so upset and depressed that I didn’t even know what life meant anymore. You turn to friends and you find they’ll just tell you to “move on”, but no one understood that it wasn’t that easy, so I distanced myself from them. I became so bad that I went and joined myself to counselling sessions with a counsellor at my University. The honesty here is that I felt like these sessions didn’t work. I was told, “join our dance/sports society and don’t think about it.” I mean, okay that will help temporarily but what about at nights when all your deep thoughts come at once and you just lay there? Months and months went on, I mean it was my first heartbreak so it was difficult, I didn’t know where to go and who turn to, the person I wanted to turn to didn’t want to know me anymore. Things got so desperate in trying to become better, I googled all sorts of things but nothing could help. It took me a year and a half to get over this situation but slowly I discovered in what to do, so this is what I would like to share with you.

One key fact that you should always remember is that no one can ever talk you out of your feelings and heartbreak. Yes, they say talking about your feelings helps but not always; as people won’t understand your situation and you don’t want to be remembered as someone who was depressed over a heartbreak.

Next key fact is that sometimes it can turn to hurting yourself, as it keeps you distracted temporarily from your real pain. But scars remain and every time you look at them you will always remember the hurt and this will make you sad in the future when things are better.

What slowly helped me was being around people I loved (family, friends) just don’t talk about your situation and try and forget what you’re going through. Get distracted by activities and laughs. Tire yourself out, so that at nights you won’t have to think about anything because you’d be so tired that there is no time to sleep. Work out, think about working on your body and health and become an even better-looking person, so your ex can look and think “I messed up!” Pick up a new hobby, try being creative, do new things! I found writing helped a lot for me, turn your feelings into short poems or songs, write a journal even. Give someone else a chance, I didn’t want to speak to anyone else after him but if I did I feel I would have gotten over him quicker, as that someone else becomes a distraction which makes your ex fade out. Reading books also helped at nights, my mind went on different thoughts and journeys before I went to sleep. Just always try and keep yourself busy, especially in becoming a better person for yourself!

All these things helped me and I just wanted to share it because I know how difficult it can be, so if I can get through it anyone can. There is hope for all of us!

Advertisements